Grandmas and Grandpas

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Grandparents can be very special resources. Just being close to them reassures a child, without words, about change and continuity, about what went before and what will come after." — Fred Rogers Ochiltree, Gay (2006-11-24). "The changing role of grandparents". Child Family Community Australia . Retrieved 2018-08-23. Furthermore, parents who live near their own parents commonly feel criticized about how they’re raising their kids.“ Parents are criticized about everything, and because we care so deeply about being a good parent, that can be challenging,” she says. “Criticism is a sore spot and can really sting.”

Xu L, Silverstein M, Chi I. Emotional closeness between grandparents and grandchildren in rural China: The mediating role of the middle generation. J Intergen Rel. 2014;12(3):226-40. doi:10.1080/15350770.2014.929936 In Bangladesh, Pakistan, and many parts of India, maternal grandparents are called Nana and Nani. Similarly, paternal grandparents are called Dada and Dadi. One's parents' maternal grandparents are called Par-nani and Par-nana. On similar lines, parents' paternal grandparents are called Par-dadi and Par-dada. A grandmother taking a nutrition class with her grandson. Baby boomers, on the other hand, are not “one size fits all” and are more influenced by one’s culture, religion, traditions, family names, inside jokes and whims. There appears to be more flexibility today in what grandparents are called, according to Ellen J. Klausner, Ph.D. Some are even charting their own paths. Lee, Kin Cheung (George); Oh, Alice; Zhao, Qianru; Wu, Fang-Yi; Chen, Shiyun; Diaz, Thomas; Ong, Chez Kuang (2017-07-03). "Repentance in Chinese Buddhism: Implications for Mental Health Professionals". Journal of Spirituality in Mental Health. 19 (3): 210–226. doi: 10.1080/19349637.2016.1204258. ISSN 1934-9637. S2CID 147858749. They say genes skip generations. Maybe that's why grandparents find their grandchildren so likeable." — Joan McIntosh'

My Grandma, 1984

Grandparents are playmates, bookkeepers of the past, and on-call babysitters. They can be crucial to the development of their grandchildren and support of their children’s families. Grandparents can also strain relationships, divide spouses, and cause generational angst. Studies suggest that living with grandparents could possibly better the physical health of kids, advance their language skills, and strengthen their moral compass. To enjoy these benefits, though, parents and in-laws need to get along. This is where it can get messy.

Timonen V, Conlon C, Scharf T, Carney G. Family, state, class and solidarity: Re-conceptualising intergenerational solidarity through the grounded theory approach. Eur J Ageing. 2013;10(3):171-179. doi:10.1007/s10433-013-0272-x When our first grandson started to talk, he would get confused between Grandma and Grandpa and would call us Mawpaw." As with any relationship, some discussion about expectations and boundaries is a good idea. Some grandparents just want to relax with their grandkids and not bear the burden of caring for them when their parents are not around, while others love spending as much time with them as possible. Some grandparents might love their grandkids but are content to see them only on holidays and birthdays as opposed to living with them. It’s tough to not lean on grandparents when they’re needed, but to keep the relationship positive for everyone, it’s important to make sure they’re comfortable with what you expect from them. The parents of a grandparent, or the grandparents of a parent, are called the same names as grandparents (grandfather/-mother, grandpa/-ma, granddad/-ma, etc.) with the prefix great- added, with an additional great- added for each additional generation. One's great-grandparent's parents would be "great-great-grandparents".

My Grandma Didn't Care

In this huge old occidental culture our teaching elders are books. Books are our grandparents!" — Gary Snyder, Practice of the Wild The relationship between grandparent and grandchild is a sacred one unique in its own right. When a newborn comes into the family, they usually have at least two generations' unconditional love. Grandparents are there for their children's children as they grow up from wanting to curl up in grandpa's lap, to asking grandma for life advice. Grandparent quotes capture the beautiful relationship between grandma, grandpa, and grandchild. Being grandparents sufficiently removes us from the responsibilities so that we can be friends." — Allan Frome In Switzerland, the relationship between grandchildren and grandparents is protected by Article 274a of the Swiss Civil Code:

Luke Evans reveals he has lost a staggering 17lbs in 10 weeks as he shows off his ripped physique in shirtless video No cowboy was ever faster on the draw than a grandparent pulling a baby picture out of a wallet.” — Unknown Finally, being in charge of the grandparent names gives you an opportunity to carry on traditions from your own childhood. "My father is Gramf, since that's what we called my grandfather," says one mom. When your child chooses the grandparents' names And then you have Amy Finklestein. Tommy, her only grandchild, couldn’t say Grandma, a moniker she wasn’t thrilled with anyway. “So when he heard everyone else call me Amy, he just did the same — so Amy it is,” she says. Her husband Howard is Oward. “It’s very cute and funny.”Grandparents enjoy most the company of their grandchildren. For with them, they experience the miracle of being 10 again." — Meeta Ahluwalia Del Priore, Mary (2007). O Príncipe Maldito . Rio de Janeiro: Objetiva. pp.67–69. ISBN 978-8573028676. Since taking care of grandchildren could be a highly demanding job that requires constant energy and time devotion, [29] grandparental involvement in child raising could have a negative impact on grandparents’ physical and emotional health. For example, taking care of grandchildren can reduce grandparents’ own time for self-care such as missing their medical appointments. Therefore, they are likely to have a higher chance to suffer from physical health issues. [30] In the US, compared with those who do not take care of their grandchildren, grandparents who are involved in childcare are more likely to have poor physical conditions, such as heart disease, hypertension or body pain. [31] Besides physical health issues, grandparents are also likely to have emotional issues. To be more specific, raising young children again could be a stressful and overwhelming experience and thus results in different kinds of negative emotions such as anxiety or depression. [32] In addition to physical and emotional issues, grandparents who are involved in caring for their grandchildren can also suffer socially. For instance, grandparents will be forced to limit their social activities so as to care for their grandchildren. By doing so, grandparents become more isolated from their social relations. [33] Taking care of grandchildren also means more responsibilities, grandparents would fear for their grandchildren's future well-being because of their disability and death in the future. [34] If grandparents cannot handle the caregiver role of their grandchildren well, this job can eventually become a burden or stressor and bring more severe physical health and emotional issues to grandparents. [35] Charli XCX sparks engagement rumours to The 1975 drummer George Daniel after she shares snap of herself wearing a glittering diamond ring I grew up with my grandparents around. I think that's important for a child. If for no other reason than to hear stories about their parents when they were children." — Al Roker

Earlier research kind of ignored grandpas in favor of grandmas, who were thought to have a more significant impact on grandchildren. This makes sense: Women traditionally are more responsible for childrearing, more socialized to put greater focus on family relationships, and statistically, they live longer than grandfathers and therefore have more time to influence grand-offspring. ( Researchers debate the legitimacy of the “grandmother effect,” however, which is the theory that menopause helped improve humans’ chances for survival because grandmas could help raise grandkids once grandmothers became infertile.)a b c Margaret, Platt Jendrek (1994). "Grandparents who parent their grandchildren: circumstances and decisions". The Gerontologist. 34 (2): 206–216. doi: 10.1093/geront/34.2.206. PMID 8005493. A child needs a grandparent, anybody’s grandparent, to grow a little more securely into an unfamiliar world.” — Charles and Ann Morse Grandparents are like magicians. They can create wonderful memories for their grandchildren out of thin air." No one who has not known that inestimable privilege can possibly realize what good fortune it is to grow up in a home where there are grandparents." — Suzanne La Follette Cancian M, Meyer DR, Brown PR, Cook ST. Who gets custody now? Dramatic changes in children's living arrangements after divorce. Demography. 2014;51(4):1381-96. doi:10.1007/s13524-014-0307-8